Shakira Gets A Star on the Walk Of Fame

 So I went to Hollywood and Vine's walk of fame in hopes of meeting Shakira, there was a lot of people just screaming and hollering and I was all excited and ready for her to come out so we could all laugh and sing and cry together. Cause im such a lesbian for her. So then I looked over at some girl wearing a Shakira t-shirt and I asked her, omg so when is she coming? I cant wait to see her!. To which then she replied, "Shes been gone for almost an hour, she came and left". I wanted to break her face but it wasn't her fault, poor girl her breath stank too.. It's almost as if the unpleasantness of her statement conjured a sudden breeze of harrasment tormenting me from the depths of hell. Anyhow, one day I'll meet you Shakira, by any chance... Are you into anal plugs? Love ya xoxoxo

Kim Kardashian Marriage

 Hollywood's most celebrated cock hopping gold digger diva filed for divorce a couple of days ago. There is much speculation as to what led to her divorce with her newly acuired ATM of an ex husband, Kris Humpreys. Many say that Kris Humphreys' humble ways with his finances has limited Kim to one cosmetic procedure at a time. A reliable source disclosed that Kim's lack of public appearences has been due to her incomplete butt lift. One cheek saggs lower than her ex boyfriend's jeans, while the other stands firm and perky. Kim, i hope you find a boy toy that could satisfy your every needs, idealy a doctor. Unlimited access to clinical trial products that might rid you of sexually transmitted diseases and enough income to fix your bag pipe of an ass.

Dr. Conrad Murray Found Guilty

 This image depicts how Michael Jackson would have looked like if he never transitioned into an asian woman, Syke! This is Actually Dr. Conrad Murray, today he was found guilty for the murder of Connie Chung, oh shit, I mean Michael Jackson. Dr. Conrad Murray, how could you! You killed the king of pop but thats not my problem, along with him you killed the chances at future writing material for aspiring comedians. Michael produced hilarious content. For that, you should get life in prison.

Justin Bieber's Baby

THE HEMAPRODITE TEEN SENSATION JUSTIN BIEBER IS PREGNANT WITH HIS FIRST CHILD. WE SUPPORT YOU FULLY JUSTIN. IN RELATED NEWS JUSTIN WILL APPEAR ON A SEGMENT OF AN ALL NEW TEEN MOM.

The Royal Wedding

it should be a gender bender.

Lindsay Lohan Vs. Megan's Law Map

Sex in The Air